Making Amends and Clearing the Air

I've been doing some serious thinking lately, especially due in part to all the chaos and upheaval that is this place. I know it seems like I complain a lot and I don't want to come off that way. I love my job and I love this department (it might be a little masochistic) despite all of its flaws, its a good place. I had a chance to work with the lady who trained me when I first came to work for the department when it was still county wide dispatch. We'd had falling out due mostly to my being young and stupid and her being older and crotchty :). No in all seriousness, it had a lot to do with our supervisor who loves to pit his employess against each other and manipulate them into fighting with each other. And I, fell into the trap without even realizing it. I guess maturity means being able to take responsibility for your words and your actions. It was my fault for falling into the trap and saying things I shouldn't have said out of frustration. But hopefully things are better and I'll be the first to admit when I'm wrong. I don't like drama in the workplace and I sure don't want to alienate the people who will eventually be my lifeline on the other side of the radio. It's been an eyeopening experience, mostly because I've been lucky enough to avoid these types of situations by being smarter. Well, it bites and crow is not the most tasty dish in the buffet! :)

Recent Events...

I'm not sure exactly who looked at what...but now all of my favorite wasting time websites are now unavailable :( No pinterest, no youtube, and no Smith and Wesson! What?! Luckily I can still write about this thing called dispatching and the ups and downs of the job! As some have realized, the communications division has had its share of trouble over the last 4-5 months, losing 4 experienced dispatchers and having to go through the interview process (which has been hilarious), the training process (which has been exasperating), and the overall job which has left me pulling my hair out and thankful for the job at the same time. It's such a bi-polar experience, working with pain, laughter, sadness, anger and joy. And I've learned I can do a whole lot more than I thought possible. So on to the hilarity. I'm sitting in on the interview boards a couple of weeks ago and in walks this young woman. It was clear that she was female, since her breasts were pretty much all that was visible. Bear in mind I'm the only female sitting on this 5 man board and I nearly lost it. She was sweet... I'll leave it at that!

Chasing My Tail

Sorry for the delay in regular updates, I promise my time has been well spent. Or not. At this point I think my days are running together and I think today is Friday... It's like an adventure around here. Kinda like Third Watch meets Perils of Penelope or something like that. We've lost 3 people in the last two weeks and now are down to 5 fulltime dispatchers and with a department of 45 patrolmen, that's a little scarce. So my new adventure began Thursday night with us moving back to 12 hour shifts to avoid only 3 people working overtime (2 have refused, citing their god-like status as reason) (I assume lol) I'm now working with a patrol Sgt who is back on light duty after being injured in a fight. It's nice having someone in here who can answer a phone and handle the situation without us having to tie up an officer, so plus there. We have interview boards next week...any suggestions on what I need to look for? I've got my question set typed up focusing more on thought process than scenarios, but I'd appreciate the feedback :) hope everyone has a good weekend!

Happy Friday the 13th

I joke that I'm superstitious about full moons and Friday the 13th, but I have to say I do put more faith in full moons than the other. In an unexpected turn of events, we've lost two dispatchers in the last three days putting us down to five fulltime and one trainee...can anyone say overtime? I will not complain, mostly due to the fact that one who quit was one of the biggest trouble makers we had, things should be a little more peaceful now that she's gone. (:

Is There Such A Thing?

Is there such a thing as being too kind hearted or compassionate for this job? A concerned citizen brought in a newborn kitten last Friday and me, like a sap took it home simply because I think everything innocent deserves a fighting chance. I sit here on my front porch smoking and crying. (yes, I know it's a nasty habit and I should quit) I knew deep down the little guy wasn't going to survive without his momma but damn it, I was going to give him a shot. Right about 0245 he squeaked a little and then was just gone. Somehow I don't think I will ever be used to death. I've sat in the room with the hospice patient as they drew their last breath and it wasn't much different. There's just an overwhelming sense of sadness at the end of life. Yes, that person may have been a horrible person but it's the end.

Forgive me, I shouldnt blog when I'm sappy and emotional but it makes me sad.

Sorry for the weird rambling emotional text, I hope everyone's week goes well I'm going to try and enjoy my days off (:

Belatedly...

I'm claiming the fact that I celebrated the 4th too hard to actually write an update. Today is the first official day of the new shifts, so far so good... Picking up where I left off, yesterday, I may have gotten a little busy ;) Had a board interview today, yep, we're trying this again. Nervous as hell! But I sucked it up, it was all people that I work with already and they just tried to look stern (and succeeded)I'm not counting my chickens yet, I've had too many near misses and false starts (hence you just now finding out about this!) Keeping up the pace has been hard, and I now know without a shadow of doubt that your head definitely gives out before your legs do. Have to whip my brain into shape!

Bucket Listing...

So, lately I've been considering writing a memoir. Not necessarily because I think my life has been particularly interesting or poignant, but mostly because I think I've experienced a lot in my short lifetime. Haha. We traveled a lot when I was a kid and I have the dysfunctional extended family from hell...(my step-grandfather actually threatened to kill my father and uncles) and I have a unique sense of humor and outlook on life. (That's why you read this, correct?) Shift schedules were released today, still on evening shift (yay). I've come to terms with it...and I'm cool with being the badass dispatcher who always knows what the heck is going on and never gets cranky on the radio (joooking..) I'm getting away from the irritating partner (Thank God!!!) but was also informed today that when the newbie is finished with First Phase (day shift) she will be moving to evenings and into my capable hands. Eeeek. Dunno if I'm ready for that responsibility again. She seems very "with it" so I'm not worried too much, I just don't want don't want the headaches...