Is there such a thing as being too kind hearted or compassionate for this job? A concerned citizen brought in a newborn kitten last Friday and me, like a sap took it home simply because I think everything innocent deserves a fighting chance. I sit here on my front porch smoking and crying. (yes, I know it's a nasty habit and I should quit) I knew deep down the little guy wasn't going to survive without his momma but damn it, I was going to give him a shot. Right about 0245 he squeaked a little and then was just gone. Somehow I don't think I will ever be used to death. I've sat in the room with the hospice patient as they drew their last breath and it wasn't much different. There's just an overwhelming sense of sadness at the end of life. Yes, that person may have been a horrible person but it's the end.
Forgive me, I shouldnt blog when I'm sappy and emotional but it makes me sad.
Sorry for the weird rambling emotional text, I hope everyone's week goes well I'm going to try and enjoy my days off (:
As a caregiver, I see death a little differently. I see it more as a release. I guess because I've seen so many people who are tired of living and don't have the strength to go on, so for me, it's a more positive thing for that person. Sad for us, but freedom for them.
ReplyDeleteThe fact you have a heart and feel is a good thing. Will make you a better dispatcher. One that feels too much too much of the time. But having a choice of which I want to partner with, come sit beside me any time.
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